Broken Resolutions

2 weeks post NYE Res time and I've aleady broken almost all of them. That's right, I am a weak, weak human. This is why NYE Resolutions get such a bad rep...I guess they are made to be broken.

So, I know I said I wasn't going to be drinking except on very special occasions and that I would NOT be going clubbing on Sobe anymore, because we're broken up. Well, as luck would have it, I went to a business dinner on Sobe with my former crush, 2 other guys from work, and one of our bank partners. 4 guys and me..not a bad ratio if I do say so myself. Dinner turned into ice cream on Lincoln Rd that then turned into 2 games of pool at Lucky Strike leading to a cab ride to one of Sobe's hottest clubs on a Thursday night, Mokai. If you know anything about clubbing, the 4:1 ration isn't getting you in unless you buy a table which will run you at least $600. We decided we'd try our luck at the Delano hotel where there is a new club/lounge that opened called Florida Room. We had all heard good things about it, so off to the Delano we went. The guys realized that we weren't getting into the Florida Room either if we didn't recruit some more females. Within 5 minutes the guys found 2 girls totally willing to drink from our bottles. Florida Room was cool, we ended up getting a table there for the bargain price of $300. From a business stand point, we made the right move. From a personal stand point, I was hating life. My crush was totally kickin it to one of the girls we recruited (who was soooo not hot) and it was starting to erk me. We left Florida Room and then went to Cameo....gerrrr, yes Cameo. How the hell did I get suckered into this? Sobe alwas does this to me, that's why I have to stay far, far away. At this point, I feel ugly, because mind you, I'm still in my work clothes...not exactly how I represent on Sobe. So Cameo was...Cameo. Packed full of drunks and coke heads. We danced and had a good time, but as my luck would have it, my crush and the new girl were practically making out. I went from being erked to being PISSED. Somehow I built my case by thinking that he shouldn't be grinding and making out with a girl in front of one of our business partners, even though, I'm sure our business partner was jealous and wishing he could have been cheating on his wife right then instead of watching my crush make out with mediocre girl. Well, finally I had enough of this torture and I left. I said goodbye to everyone and hailed a cab. Well, guess what? I didn't have any cash and cabs in MIA don't take credit cards. Rather than go to an ATM, I decided I'd walk it. I took that opportunity to cry and hate my lonely life as well as bash my crush for kicking it to Miss Mediocre right in front of my face. Not to mention, my feet were killing me, I'm still in my work clothes at 4am, and bums and crack heads are whispering at me in the bushes. It was a very sobering experience to say the least. Luckily, I made it to my car before my feet broke into a million pieces. So there you have it, my most important resolution broken due to a business dinner that was only supposed to last an hour.

Lucy and I are on good terms again. She's been reaching out to me lately, but I've been unresponsive. I just didn't know what to say, and I especially wasn't ready to let her back in again. Well, I went shopping yesterday and who do I run into at Express? Lucy. I felt like it happened for a reason, so I just ceased the day and we went and grabbed a coffee at Starbucks. We spoke for HOURS, and now we're cool again. Forgivness isn't easy, but if you want to keep your friends and you want to live a happy full life, then it is very necessary. It felt great to put it all on the table, and I really and truly feel like we have a fresh start at our friendship. Phewww!!!

Saying Goodbye...

Woo hoo! Made it through the holidays! Now it's back to normalcy, or somewhat of it anyway. So much has happened since my last entry, I don't even know where to start. FYI- I sat down about 2 weeks ago and wrote a kick ass entry...don't know what happened, but blogger.com ate it! That thing disappeared. I was so upset, I cried myself to sleep that night. Not really, but I wanted to paint the picture.

I titled this entry "Saying Gooddbye" for a great reason. It's about that time again. Out with the old, in with the new, until you realize old wasn't so bad and possibly better than new. In which case, old is back again but feels like new because you missed it so much. Ok, I got off track. Point is, I'm in mourning.

Here is my list:
- Yvette is leaving me and moving to San Francisco with her boyfriend.
- I can no longer eat a Mexican chop chop from Chicken Kitchen with 2 sides of Mustard Curry and 2 sides of salsa.
- I am no longer going to get so wasted that I fall flat on my face in the middle of a club on South Beach.
- I am no longer crushing on co-workers.
- I am no longer friends with Lucy.
- I am breaking up with South Beach night life all together. It's been a love hate relationship from the start, but I'm ready to finally let him go.
- and for the grand finale, NO MORE CIGARETTES while I'm drinking because I will not be drinking but on super special occasions that are TBD when the time comes. Some of us have a problem with alcohol consumption.

Let's disect:
Yes, Yvette is leaving me for San Fran. Words can't even describe how much this sucks for me. I love her to death and while I know we will always be friends, it's going to take a lot of work to keep the lines of communication open. I just don't want our friendship to fall down by the wayside, and next thing you know, we're only talking on b-days.

I started my Nutri-System diet FINALLY. I've been on it for a week and going strong. I'm feeling pretty good actually. It pisses me off that we can't just eat whatever we want. Why does good food make us fat? NOT FAIR DAMN IT!

I decided that it's time to grow up and give up the club scene. There's gotta be something better to do. That's my new goal, find something better to do.

SO I have a super long story attached to NYE and the whole , no longer crushing on co-workers thing. I'll tell that story later, but the point is...work is work and it should stay there. Don't shit where you eat, and sometimes it's more fun to just flirt and fantasize than to actually see it through to fruition.

As far as Lucy, I know I haven't mentioned her before, but that friendship is over. We've had a pretty rocky friendship since highschool. With her, I always felt like I wasn't good enough, so no matter what I would do or how good I was to her, she still saw me as a selfish person. I tried and tried to prove her wrong, but at every turn, I seemed to be letting her down or at least just giving her ammunition to hold against me. In retrospect, no one should ever have to try that hard to validate their character to a friend. If someone is your friend, it's because they see your true colors and love you for them. For whatever reason, she couldn't see mine. I'll never really know what it was that was blurring her view of me. Some have said that it's jealousy, but the only one who knows that is Lucy.

So out with the old and in with the new! While, I am saddest about Yvette leaving me, I'm going to try my hardest to always keep in touch. She better do the same. The Mexican chop chop from Chicken Kitchen is pretty hard too...its been there for me on the saddest of days and darkest of nights. Now, what keeps me going is the thought of being 10lbs lighter, yay!